Anyone that trulety knows me, knows that I am a private person. I don’t go aroung flauting my lifestyle nor do I go around telling everyone I am a lesbian. I also don’t hide my sexuality either. My family and close friends know that I am gay, and anyone outside of that circle is on a need to know basis only. There will come a time when you will have to come out to someone that is outside of that circle; a co-worker or a new friend for example. Granted, you are not obligated to divulge personal information to coworkers, but there will come a time where there is no way around it. Take the company Christmas party for example; when you show up with your partner. There will be whispers and there will be questions. My question would be do you tell them before hand or do you just show up? I don’t mean to announce it to the entire company, but more so the folks you work with on an everyday basis. I have purposely avoided social events with my coworkers for this very reason. I am unsure of the reaction I will receive and I don’t want to be stuck in an awkward situation. I don’t mind coming out again because every time I do, its so much easier than the last. My dilemma is when do I do it? Or do I even need to do it at all?
As for new friends, you have that invisible thin line between telling them too soon or too late. If you tell them too soon, they may think you have ulterior motives. On the other hand, if you wait too long to tell them, they may think you don’t value the friendship for you waited so long to tell him or her. For me, If and when I strongly feel that friend will not have an issue with me being a lesbian, that’s when I tell them. If I don’t have that comfort, then I just don’t address it. I remind myself that I don’t have to explain myself to anyone. I’m telling you for the simple fact that I value our relationship; and that’s how I think situations such as those should be approached. It’s not about them, its about you.